Spotlight On Brandon Colker

I was just sitting at the kitchen table last night when a thought came to me. I get so caught up with talking about art, especially my art, I don’t take the time to put the spotlight on the people who have got me to where I am. After all, neither of us are where we are in our lives by our own doing, but because of the people in our lives. One particular person who comes to mind who has been a big blessing in my life as well as a great friend would be Brandon Colker.

Brandon is a bit of a genius if I dare to say so myself. He has recently released a major book to the cyber shelves of Amazon entitled, “Brandon Colker’s How To Make Big Bucks from Big Blogs,” and already it has seen some incredible net traffic and volume. The book has made bloggers out of those who never thought they had what it took to become a blogger or never cared to BE a blogger, but for those who were already bloggers prior to reading this masterpiece of a book, I suppose you could say their “blogging game” has shot through the roof.

Brandon Colker has always had a way with people and a desire to see others succeed so I guess it’s not such a big surprise to me that he would release such a book aimed at turning what millions of people do every day into income.

We had a bit of a discussion about the book just because I had a few questions about it. I wanted to know, what if someone didn’t have a big blog to make big bucks from? For all of you who blog as well as myself, we know that creating a big blog with a huge following takes time, time, more time, patience, practice and more time. Basically, to get a get a big blog you’ll need to be writing every day as a full time job and some of us just don’t have that kind of time. Brandon’s response to my question was perfect. “If you don’t have a big blog or no blog at all, don’t sweat it! The book will walk you through the process and give descriptive steps of what it takes to get a big blog. The book is like a guide. We are building a big blog together. I wrote this with the newest person in mind.”

Dana Sibilsky—Financial Struggles of a SAHM

A couple of years prior, I was continually seeing those stupid advertisements, and each time I saw one I’d murmur thoughtfully, wishing there truly was a true blue way that I could win some cash without abandoning my longing to be at home with my children.

I remember it like it was yesterday—the tallying out change from the change jug to purchase bananas before the following paycheck and the welcome of a dinner imparted to companions and realizing that it would offer help to your contracted basic supply finance… the tears of dissatisfaction at not having the capacity to extend the dollars very to the extent you’d like, and making troublesome choices on what to do without. It wasn’t easy back then, but it could be worse for those starting out in these times.

There are numerous online colleges that offer remote positions that can be worked from a home office. Without a doubt, these sorts of positions regularly oblige some kind of accreditations, however they can be beneficial to a great degree. I have worked for a local university before as an extra employee for about 2 years in the past. I began low maintenance, and moved to full time soon after I hit my one year commemoration. I have 3 children and this position meets expectations superbly for me while satisfying my need to stay included in keeping up my training. I couldn’t envision a more impeccable occupation for me right now.

Dana Sibilsky—Why You Should Excuse and Forgive

After you are wronged and the starting influx of feeling has passed, you’re given another test: Do you overlook the individual? By pardoning, you let go of your grievances and judgments and permit yourself to recuperate. While this may sound great in principle, by and by absolution can at times feel unimaginable.

To figure out how to excuse, you should first realize what pardoning is definitely not. A large portion of us hold in any event a few misguided judgments about pardoning.

By pardoning, you are tolerating the truth of what happened and figuring out how to live in a condition of determination with it. This can be a steady process—and it doesn’t fundamentally need to incorporate the individual you are excusing. Pardoning isn’t something you accomplish for the individual who wronged you; it’s something you accomplish for you.

So if pardoning is something you accomplish for yourself and in the event that it can help you recuperate, why is it so hard?

There are a few reasons: You’re loaded with considerations of reprisal or requital; you appreciate feeling predominant; you don’t know how to determine the circumstance; you’re dependent on the adrenaline that outrage gives; you self-recognize as a “casualty”; or you’re worried about the possibility that that by forgetting you need to re-interface—or lose your association—with the other individual. These reasons not to pardon can be determined by turning out to be more acquainted with yourself, with your musings and emotions, and with your limits.

You will in any case recall what happened, however you will never again be bound by it. Having worked through the sentiments and realized what you have to do to reinforce your limits or get your needs met, you are better ready to deal with yourself later on. Forgetting the other individual is an eminent approach to respect yourself. It certifies that you should be cheerful. Forgive because YOU deserve it.

Failure Produces Success: True Story

Success is the fruit of failure. I’ll say it one more time: Success is the fruit of failure. What does that mean? Before I get into the explanation of this well known fact, I’d like to tell a story which will serve as my deliverance into those words.

When my oldest brother was in high school, his graduating class didn’t have the slightest idea of what they wanted to do after graduation. I kid you not, absolutely everyone was clueless except him; he knew exactly what he was going to do. Back then, jobs were scarce. Jobs today are still hard to come by and I believe they are more difficult to snag in today’s present times than they were back then because everything is made so difficult. More on that rant later. My brother’s response to this setback was military because he believed there was no other way.

Fast forward a bit to save time—after studying for the ASVAB test to be accepted into the military, he takes the test three times and fails all three times. What is he going to do now? His believed-to-be one shot at a decent life in this world is done and gone. A few years pass and my brother gets his driver’s license at 21 along with his first job ( I told you it was tough) working at Little Caesars. He worked that job for 4 years before getting a job at a gas station. He ends up crashing our grandpa’s car (because he never had his own) then getting fired shortly after buying a new car. Now what is he going to do? There was unemployment option and he didn’t own a credit card for emergency.

At this point, it’s clear he’s in trouble. He has bills piling up and feels like he’s drowning along with his credit rating in letters and phone calls from debt collectors. After being unemployed and searching for jobs, he get’s hired at a local supermarket and has high hopes this will change his life. To add to his discouragement, this job only worked him 5-15 hours of the ENTIRE WEEK. That’s no way to make bill payments and safe for a future.

One day, our mother calls him up and says she knows a guy who just may have a job for him. Desperately, he calls the number she gave him to call and spoke with this professional gentleman. Today, my brother has a great job and is slowly climbing back to where he was financially while looking to make a career of his current job as he improves and masters his craft with his new employment.

I’m sorry to bore you with a drawn out story, but the moral of this story is failure will, at some point and time, breed success. Success is a journey, not a destination and that is exactly what my brother knew while going through his trials and tribulation. This doesn’t mean, by any means, the obstacles are finished coming and the trials cease. Anything—good or bad, can happen and it’s important to take both with an open mind.

Something my husband taught me follow the same words my brother lives by as I talk about in this guest post article for Uncustomary of how to worry less. There’s no need to worry about what you can’t do anything about or in my brother’s case, if you can do something about it then do it and don’t worry.

Patience Is A Virtue

There’s a saying that goes, “Patience is a virtue,” but I’m curious of how many people know what it means. If I look up the word “virtue” in two different dictionaries, of course I’m going to get two different definitions. One definition of the word “virtue” says, “the quality of doing what is right and avoiding what is wrong.” The other definition is, “Behavior showing high moral standards.” If I put that together with the old saying, patience is a virtue is to wait and behave without getting upset.

We can’t deny that we have lost the meaning to this saying and become more impatient as a society. Today, everything is done fast. We had to wait for the mail when I was growing up whereas today it’s mostly instant E-mail and text messages.  My mother and grandmother would prepare dinner for me as a child and it would take time. I remember waiting 30 minutes just to be able to eat and if you wait that long at a restaurant, people begin to get angry and will either leave or not tip. Today, preparing food is what we do on big holidays for the entire family and we live out of the freezer by eating frozen dinners that are already prepared for us.

The microwave saves us so much time having to wait for a stove or an oven to cook it, however even microwaves seem to be taking too long for us. On my lunch break at work, I recall seeing a co-worker standing by the microwave, staring into it and saying, “Come on….Come on, come on, come on…” to it. Fast-food restaurants  have ruined us with their offer of hot meals made ready to be eaten while on the go. If you eat out often, you’ve already been teaching yourself some terribly bad habits of what to expect from life. We have been training ourselves in the ways of instant gratification and that shows the lack of discipline we have acquired.

The Psychology Behind The Smile

Have you ever heard that smiling changes your mood? At first, I didn’t think much about it. I have been sad and tried smiling, but alas, I was still sad. There are a few sayings and quotes that support this claim that smiling can have an affect on your mood and it all starts with the brain.  It has been a saying that has been around for many a generation that goes, “Smile for a while to make bad feelings docile.” or even in the words of Thich Hanh who said, “Sometimes joy is the reason why you smile, but sometimes your smile can be the reason for your joy.”

What is there to smile about?

Other than to be grateful that you woke up today and when you got out of bed your legs still worked, there is plenty of reasons to smile. First and foremost, the smile is a universal language that known to everyone that if you smile at them, you’re friendly, warm and welcoming. This is the reason why I don’t believe in pretending to like someone by smiling. My mother would always tell me, “Dana Sibilsky, you’re lying to their face with your face by making that person believe you are warm and welcoming to that person.” Let’s be honest here.

When you smile, you appear more attractive unless you are a man. Apparently, women find men who don’t smile as much more masculine and attractive. Being a woman myself, I dub this as false. Smiling has been recorded in multiple researches to lift up your mood and even the mood of those who see you smile because, as mentioned before, smiling makes you seem friendly. Who doesn’t feel happier when surrounded by friendly people?

Smiling is catchy

Probably something that is more contagious than the flu or a common cold, smiling ranks up higher on the list. If you smile at someone it’s a normal reaction for people to smile back and if they don’t then it’s simply because they have made an effort not to return a smile. The reasons why it’s catchy are in the mind.

Happy smiling brains

It’s all in your head. No, literally it’s all in your head. Studies found that the stress fighting neuropeptides are activated when you smile. These little guys are what help the body understand that we are happy, sad, stressed, angry, etc.. Other chemicals are brought into play just by spreading a smile across your face such as endorphins, dopamine and serotonin which help you feel good—especially the endorphins, which are most powerful pain reliever known to man and they are natural! That doesn’t mean you’ll get a rush of endorphins to end your pain just by smiling.

In conclusion, there is plenty to smile about and with this information, there are many more reasons to smile and smile big. Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” a smile will bring you up to where you should always be.

Birds of A Feather Flock Together

There’s an old saying that goes, “Birds of a feather flock together.” This saying is basically meaning that you are who you choose to associate with. Thinking back to where I was years ago, I’m surprised and thankful for where I am now. We have all been there, haven’t we? Maybe you’ve been in the presence of bad company or perhaps you still are.

One of my favorite quotes I heard from a respectable businessman is that your income with be the average of the top 5 people you hang out with most. When I was first starting out in life, my income from my minimal wage job was 116 a month. My friends weren’t exactly the best people to look up to for advice in advancing forward through life and I was the only one working out of the 3 of us. You know what happened next? You guessed it—I surrounded myself with losers with no aim or direction in life and they sponged off me. I paid for the gas and the food. It was very soon that I noticed I was becoming just like them…Broke!

When I met my husband, I learned there is more power in who we associate ourselves with we might think. The people you surround yourself with molds your beliefs, morals, standards, perspective on life and as we have learned recently, even your money. How did I fix this? The answer is very simple: Dana Sibilsky had to pull the plug. That was the plug that connected me to a lot of people that I learned were not good for my future. I had to learn I have a life to live and if you’re not going forward with me, you will be left behind. I had to stop living to please people.

Now, let me clarify. I’m not saying stop caring for people. Absolutely not! I’m saying through time, you’ll learn which people can be helped and which people will sponge off the blessings you give them. Those who make an effort are those who want to better themselves. You might want to keep these people around.

Are You Dead?

 

What are you passionate about? Have you taken the time to  think about it lately? Chances are, if you are among the masses, your passion died out just shortly after high school. I would say not to worry and it’s completely normal because it happens to so many people, but passion is kind of a big deal and if you have no passion, you are dead. Allow me to explain. Benjamin Franklin once said,

“Many people die at twenty five and aren’t buried until they are seventy five.”

What do you think he means? He’s talking about your dreams, your passion, your fire. He’s talking about that special something that gets you up in the morning or maybe it keeps you up all night filled with energy or even excitement. You see, there is no such thing as a low-energy person and there is no such thing as a high-energy person. Each one of us knows one or the other or even both types of people.

The person who seems to laze around all day with no drive, no ambition, no sense of urgency is the person who has no energy. This person has no aim or direction and it’s been so long since they have been inspired or motivated you could say they have given up. They are dead. Once your dreams and your passion die, what is left of you?

The high-energy person is eager, excited, driven and you might even say they come off as annoying or even overbearing. They have their goals and steps to get accomplish each one ready for the next day. This person might even say, “I just don’t know if I can go on, but I have to.” This is a person who has passion. Passion is energy. When your burning desire is strong enough, you will somehow find the motivation and energy to do what absolutely must be done. This person has not let their fire inside the die and it is these types of people that inspire even those who are dead.

How to prevent from becoming a zombie

If you don’t want to end up like everyone else, going from day to day with no direction, You could take good ol’ Dana Sibilsky‘s advice and get with a life coach, a mentor. Find someone who has in life what you want and study that person. The more dreamers and successful people you are around, the more you come to life and you LEARN how to dream again.

Read success books from well-known coaches such as John C. Maxwell, which is one of my personal favorites. You will find yourself in the books you read and the people you associate with. This would be one of the greater things you’ll ever do for yourself. Remember: Don’t ask yourself what does the world needs, ask yourself what makes you come alive because the world needs people who are alive.

The Choice of Happiness

In all my many years on this Earth, I’ve come to find that in regards to happiness, you are going to be about as happy as you make your mind up to be. What does this mean? A lot of people believe happiness is dependant on what happens to you from day to day.

Happiness comes from the root word “happenstance” and so it is highly understood why someone would think this way. Happiness, however, isn’t dependant on what happens to you or how someone treats you. If your happiness is dependant on events that happen in your day to day life and the outcome of your interaction with others, you’re going to be a very miserable person.

In conclusion, I, Dana Sibilsky, know that happiness is indeed a choice. You have to decide to be happy. Have you ever seen the movie, “The Pursuit of Happyness” with Will Smith? What he says in the beginning of the film is powerful and I shall leave you with his quote. “It was right then that I started thinking about Thomas Jefferson on the Declaration of Independence and the part about our right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And I remember thinking how did he know to put the pursuit part in there? That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can actually never have it. No matter what. How did he know that?

Life And Blessings

When I first started this blog site, I knew I wanted to get into writing. All throughout school I had always been told how good of a writer I was, but I never really thought much of it. We never take too seriously what positive things other people tell us, do we? With my blog up and running, I knew what that I wanted to write about topics that people wanted to read about, so, the idea the blog would be based on would be life, family, health and happiness.

If you search through Google, you’ll see a lot of the postings have to do with the things that people care most about. Life, happiness and love are some of the higher ranking keywords. These are topics that are at the top of every person’s list. When it comes to life, you can’t doubt there is a spiritual part of it, in fact, that part is a big part! There is a difference in the spiritual and religion, so let’s not confuse the two. Of course, there are those who may say they are not into the the spiritual belief, however it doesn’t matter if they are or not. As Rob Bell once said, “You cannot deny what is central to your makeup as a human being.”

We have all been blessed in one way or another and in multiple ways. We have homes, jobs, cars, family, friends, clothes to wear and food to eat. Think about it, have you ever been without food? Haven’t your needs always been met? Haven’t you always been sheltered and clothed? In my opinion, the best way to show your appreciation for the blessings you have is to bless someone else. What is the point of being blessed in life if we don’t give them to others to enjoy? We are all in this together.

I was walking with my sister a couple weeks ago on the sidewalk between the road to my right and a long stretch of stores and restaurants to my left. Suddenly, a old man black male with very few teeth approached us. My sister continued walking because I suppose she knew what he was going to say. The old gentleman looked at me and said, “Listen, I know how annoying it is to have a stranger come up to you and start talking, but hear me out. I’ve been laid off for a while. I keep bouncing from one job to another and nothing is working out.” He then steps back and continues, “I’m going to step back, because I don’t want you to think I’m trying to mug you. Just please, I’m hungry. Is there anything you can give?” My sister was gesturing me to follow her and leave the man, but my heart went out to him. Without hesitation, I pulled out $20 and gave it to him. Shocked and overwhelmed with humility, he gives me a hug and continues to thank me over and over.

Now, I’ve heard two types of responses from people when I tell this story. One response is praise for being so kind. The other response I get questions my actions and judgment. I have heard, “Are you serious? What if he just takes the money and buys alcohol or drugs?” It’s absolutely none of my business what this gentleman does with money I give him. All I can do is what I can control. I gave him a resource. I did my part in being a blessing to this man. If he was lying, what goes around comes around and justice is always served at some point in time. I don’t think about that. I think, “Here is my chance to serve someone today and make an impact in their life.” It reflects on my life motto: “The whole reason of being blessed is to bless others in life.”